Remote To Mute Your Children

Early this morning I was resting comfortably in my bed, laying there listening to my kids argue about who got more cereal in their bowl. Though they weren’t just arguing, it was that high pitch ear bleeding whining. I gritted my teeth and tried to relax when every nerve in my body was in a fevered pitch.

I continued on with my day, doing laundry, directing the kids as to what chore needed to be done next, etc. When out of the blue my daughter Aubry comes screaming into the bathroom where I was. I was freaked out in an instant, wondering what was causing her to wail like that. “MOM! SHE WON’T GIVE ME THAT THING BACK, SHE JUST TAKED IT FROM ME.” I said in a calm voice, “What thing?” and my daughter answered, “That chewed up Barbie shoe.” I couldn’t believe it. My daughter was freaking out over a chewed up Barbie shoe that her sister took from her. Was this really happening?

Fast forwarded to 3pm. Time for our Girl Scout meeting. We jumped in the car and was on our way. The sun beaming at my sensitive-headache-riddled eyeballs. The girls in the very back of the mom-van arguing again over a doll that was supposed to stay home. And that’s when it happened. The epiphany came to me as a sun ray shining right into my over worked brain. I even mentioned it my boyfriend.

God would have been considered a genius (by me, not that he isn’t already) had he given every parent a remote with a child mute button. Think about it………………………….See what I mean? Think of how many lives would and could be saved with a child mute button. I know what your thinking, that I would miss hearing my children’s voices. No because there would be rules with the remote. Rules that couldn’t be changed. Like, the mute only last for 5 minutes, you can only press the mute button once an hour and once the children reach 18 it will no longer work.

Oh the sanity that would be saved. The awesomeness part of this mute remote is, it works on all children not just yours. Example: say your child is acting rather well, yet you’re sitting in a theatre for 4 hours awaiting the arrival of a much anticipated movie such as The Twilight Saga: New Moon, and there you are, in a room full of annoying teenagers and about 15 parents. You could sync up your remotes in intervals and have about a good couple of hours of total quiet. The teenagers can talk and hear each other but the adults can’t hear anything.

Seriously, this is awesome. I know there are sooo many times in my life that I’ve wished for such a thing. If it ever comes to pass you know where you heard it first, SHEER CHAOS DOT COM!!!!!!! Can I get an AMEN?

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