As you all know I love vampire stuff…pretty much anything vampire, I’ll read or watch. My family has kindly sat through The Twilight Saga on our blue-ray many times over. My children have even picked their Teams.
After falling in love with Anne Rice’s vampire, Louis, obsessively drooling over Stephenie Meyer’s vampire, Edward, and becoming enthralled with Charlaine Harris’s vampires, Bill and Eric, I’ve learned that vampires are what I love reading about.
Naturally, I’ve become an avid Vampire Know-It-All. I read my Twilight to brighten up a dull reading month; I watch Vampire Diaries to pacify my craving until True Blood starts its new season. But nothing helps the addiction to the midnight showings of The Twilight Saga.
While reading about this threesome, I’ve had the pleasure of visualizing every scene in my over active imagination, so when it was brought to HBO, I couldn’t wait. I was biting at the bit, anticipating the flicks of fangs, the drips of blood, the passionate kissing. This is my Sunday night treat for a long week of hard work. I wasn’t fooling myself, I knew with it being on HBO it would have nudity, sexuality, violence, blood (duh!). What I wasn’t prepared for was the many turns the show has taken away from the books plot I know by heart or the various sexual liaisons of all the characters. Sure there was bed hopping in the books, but not like the show.
Each season, the sex scenes are becoming more frequent and kinkier. Which I’m ok with, I mean if I was a couple centuries old I’m sure my sex life would be far from “normal” and maybe even a bit kinky too, but when your sitting down in your living room after putting your kids to bed, with your boyfriend snuggled up next to you while your father is seated comfortably in the recliner, its very difficult to enjoy Eric’s chiseled rock hard body or to imagine how warm Alcide really is as a werewolf, or even to swoon over how proper Bill is. It’s even worse with your dad and boyfriend making fun of the characters with lame comments or have complete silence for the entire 2 minute graphic sex scene shown from every possible angle. I mean really!
Sure, I DVR True Blood, I can watch it at any time, but I know it airs a new episode every Sunday Night. I want to watch it on Sunday. I don’t want to sit on the couch and pretend to tell myself that it’s not currently recording right now, or have to convince myself to watch Cupcake Wars instead of True Blood.
All I’m saying is, Allan Ball has taken the series to a whole new level of soft-gay-furry-voyeuristic-bloody-bed swapping-gender confused-porn and that isn’t worth $16 a month or the awkwardness to watch it…but I’ll still pay for it because it’s an addiction…I think?